Extraordinary Times

Extraordinary Times 23: Why are Some Kids Anxious While Others Are Not?

What differentiates our kids from each other?  Some children are easy-going and carefree, and some are so anxious and fearful.  There are many reasons, including the following:

• Constitutional temperament from birth
• We inherit anxiety genetically
• Environmental factors impact anxiety
• Kids overhear parents talking about their own worries
• Media can be frightening and should be limited
• Children are more intuitive than you think; they pick up and absorb our feelings

When anxiety continues to intensify and interferes with healthy functioning, try techniques to reduce the anxiety and tension in the home.  If the child’s anxiety persists or increases, contact a mental health professional.

Extraordinary Times 22: Maintaining Outdoor Boundaries with Neighbors

As the weather warms up and we spend more time outside, we may face the dilemma of how to handle neighbors who do not respect the same level of social distancing boundaries that you prefer.

• You can gently and simply explain to unsupervised children that for the time being, while we are all still dealing with coronavirus, we all must play separately with our own toys in our own yards until it is safer to play closer together.
• You may need to talk with adult neighbors to explain that you are trying to maintain firmer social distancing boundaries for your family and that while they may think it is too extreme, that these are the limits you are comfortable with at this time.
• If your neighbors are difficult and continue to defy your requests for maintaining safe boundaries, you may need to adjust the times of day when your family goes outside and/or change the area around your house to maintain more distance from others.

Remember, it is important to maintain friendly relationships with your neighbors, so monitor your tone and attitude.

Extraordinary Times 21: What is “Quarantine Fatigue”?

After a while, people grow tired of being quarantined and they tend to venture away from their homes more often and take more risks with social distancing measures.

• Experts posit that once we began the second month of quarantine, people became more restless with no end in sight.
• People are getting mixed messages about whether or not to loosen lock-down guidelines.
• Warmer weather encourages people to go outside more.
• Face masks may give people an increased sense of protection and security.
• People feel isolated and lonely and seek outside connection.

Feeling isolated and restless are not reasons to disregard what is best for one’s personal safety and health and the safety and health of others.  Address restlessness and isolation through more measured methods of connecting with others:

• Make more telephone calls. 
• Learn to use video conferencing. 
• Drop off cooked food and home-made gifts for others.
• Plan very small meet-ups to walk or talk from safe distances outdoors.

Extraordinary Times 20: What Can We Learn from Quarantine?

It is easy to list all that we don’t like about the limitations and losses related to being quarantined. It may be more difficult to recognize the benefits:

• We become more aware and grateful for the good people in our lives.
• We learn that we are more resourceful than we thought before.
• We realize the importance of slowing down to enjoy a meal or a book or a conversation.
• We learn more about those we live and share more experiences with them.
• We learn how to entertain ourselves and to be more creative.
• We realize talents and strengths we never knew we had.
• We become better at sharing and setting valuable priorities.
• Hopefully we will learn how to take better care of the environment and each other.

Extraordinary Times 19: What Is PTSD?

PTSD stands for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and is a psychological reaction to a trauma, a severe stressor, a natural disaster, being the victim or witness of a crime, living through a devastating catastrophe, and other similar types of circumstances.

We used to think that only war veterans and victims of violent crimes could have PTSD.  We now know anyone can develop PTSD following an overwhelming, frightening disaster; either personal or environmental.  The pandemic is just that sort of disaster and many people may develop PTSD as a result. 

There are several risk factors that may predispose a person to develop PTSD, that include:

• Previous history of trauma
• Underlying mental health problems
• Ongoing, long-term exposure to the stressor/s
• Not having the opportunity to talk about the trauma with anyone

PTSD does not always go away by itself. The longer you keep your feelings and fears inside, the worse it becomes and the more aspects of your life are impacted.  Most often, therapy is the best way to treat and cure PTSD.

Extraordinary Times 18: What If School Doesn’t Start in the Fall?

If families will be working and going to school from home in the fall, anxiety may intensify.  How will we cope?

• Designate specific places and times in the home for everyone to have some privacy for school/work.
• Everyone still needs to get outside during the day to de-stress and breathe fresh air.
• Everyone needs some time at the end of the school/work day to unwind and relax.
• Allot specific time for homework and areas in the home, or outside, to complete their work.
• Younger children may need more help from parents with technology glitches.
• Stay in touch with teachers if you have questions or concerns.